I Miss Them So Much

even though it's only been a week, and paul calls to check on me, says he's been hearing good things. i hope so, but i feel like i've lost a big part of my life.

i don't feel comfortable in my new job yet. i still feel as if i'm an interloper in the old boys' club. jay has made me feel better, and i like working with him. but that's only two hours out of eight. the other six i'm just sitting at my sequestered little desk, not talking to anyone, doing nothing but data entry. and i shouldn't complain, because this job is so much better for me in regards to school. which i am rocking in, btw.

i get to see more of ben, that's another upside of this job. i was starting to really miss my fella. i gave him a lift home from work today and we talked about music and our new jobs.

it seems silly that the thing about all this i dread the most is growing apart from dustin. i feel like, sometimes... it's hard. i feel like, my heart would just break if he weren't in my life anymore. we really have been through so much together. it's just hard.

*sigh*

anyway, i've got a paper to do. yay.

i love writing, but i can never make myself do it.